Outgrow Pornography
9 out of 10 young Christian men are addicted to porn. Half of young Christian women are also addicted, and addiction rates keep going up (The Freedom Fight). Despite mountains of research highlighting its devastating consequences, pornography addiction isn't even recognized as a problem by most secular clinicians. Pornography use is proven to fuel sex trafficking, sexual violence and sexism while causing a decline in sexual function (ED, etc.), marital satisfaction, and even faith! If you're visiting this page, though, you probably already know porn is bad.
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If you're here, you've likely already tried to quit on your own. You may have even tried "accountability" with other believers. But it hasn't worked yet. Neurologically speaking, pornography is one of the most powerful addictions known to man, which means our treatment approach must do more. We must incorporate brain science, biblical truth, and relational supports in a program proven to work.
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Fortunately, there is great hope. Lee is a Certified Sexual Addiction Discipleship Leader with The Freedom Fight, a program boasting an 86% success rate helping people break free from porn. Lee is currently assembling groups to take people through the Freedom Fight program, helping them outgrow porn for good. Of course, he is also available for one-on-one counseling and couples counseling for more intensive and personalized work.
Other Resources
The Freedom Fight app. This thing offers a lot, including instructional videos, a daily check-in tool, a "crash report" to learn from relapse, ways to connect with groups, and more! You can explore on your own, but it can also be an essential complement to a comprehensive strategy eliminating porn from your life.
The Freedom Fight book. Lee has found that the book is usually not the best resource for individuals trying to outgrow porn; instead, the book is great for leaders who want to move the needle on this devastating issue or clinicians who want to understand it better.
Unwanted by Jay Stringer is a great book that helps people understand the roots of their pornography use and other unwanted sexual behavior. Informed by cutting-edge research, this book provides some practical tools and insights, such as what actually makes "accountability" work. However, Lee endorses this book with some reservation. Stringer's view: approaching unwanted sexual behavior with curiosity can reveal historical roots that need to be healed. Lee's view: Stringer is not wrong, but he paints with a broad brush. Some people feel frustrated using Stringer's approach if they cannot point to a specific issue that needs to be healed to outgrow their addiction. Lee feels it is important to acknowledge that pornography has some inherent appeal because of how God made sex to be appealing. Clients should be curious if there is a root that needs to be healed while also humbly remembering everyone is susceptible to this addiction, and effective treatment is multifaceted.
Fight for Love by Rosie Makinney. This is the best resource Lee has found for women who would like to fight for their marriages in the face of porn addiction. The podcast by the same name is also excellent. It is important to know Rosie Makinney is not a clinician, but her husband is, and she has lots of experience in this area of ministry. Makinney also strongly recommends people work with a CSAT (Certified Sex Addiction Therapist). Makinney's husband is a CSAT, and her recommendation is understandable, but Lee does not necessarily agree for a few reasons: 1) There are very few CSATs in the area. The common, widespread nature of these issues contrasted with the lack of availability of CSATs make working with a CSAT an unrealistic goal in most cases. 2) Obtaining a CSAT certification is comparable to getting another master's degree, so it's not something most Christian counselors are willing to do. 3) Successfully working with individuals and couples in this area does require specific knowledge and training, but it does not require a CSAT. In Lee's opinion, there are two things that are more important than a specific credential: relationship with Christ and a specific approach proven to work. Aside from Makinney's fixation on CSATs, Lee finds her resources to be very helpful, especially in encouraging partners of porn addicts, giving them hope, and normalizing their experiences.
Pure Desire support groups. Timberline Church in Fort Collins hosts a weekly Pure Desire support group on Tuesdays at 7pm. Timberline Windsor also advertises a Betrayal and Beyond support group for women on Mondays at 6pm. Lee recommends confirming with Timberline before attending either group